We’re cutting straight to the chase; not all validation and affirmation is healthy! Sure, we all long for it, especially in romantic relationships, but have you ever heard or even felt something being too good to be true? Well, welcome to the world of love bombing.
After a month of dating, you’ve had a few lavishing dinners, received floral arrangements (the big, IG-worthy ones), and gotten compliments that made you smile from ear to ear.
Now, this could mean that you’ve found the one… but it could also mean you’ve found yourself an A-1 love bomber. But how can we tell the difference? We’re here to help.
what is love bombing?
Love bombing is a manipulative tactic used to make someone fall in love. It is portrayed with excessive attention, affection, gift-giving, and reassurance. It is frequently a symptom of narcissistic personality disorder and, most times, an unconscious behavior. Love bombers feed their ego by maintaining power over the relationship by controlling how their partner feels.
how to detect love bombing
Love bombing can be hard to detect because it feels so right. You feel valued, appreciated, and, most of all, happy. After all, a love bomber does anything they can to trigger the release of dopamine. Here are some of the most common red flags to look out for:
- They shower you with exaggerated compliments.
- They “spoil you” with luxurious gifts.
- They remind you of all the things they’ve done for you.
- They demand your time.
- They require constant reassurance.
what makes someone love bomb?
While some love bombers do it for their ego, others genuinely suffer from attachment disorders. This can range from low self-esteem, insecure attachment style, abandonment issues, et cetera. Now, this does not necessarily mean that you should exit the relationship. If you feel that you could be being love bombed, start setting boundaries that make you more comfortable.
Always voice your opinions and form the habit of open communication. Be patient with yourself and with your partner. It will be wise to understand why you’re being love-bombed and then assess whether it is something that you can work on.
are you love bombing?
Maybe something in this article helped you to notice that you may be love bombing that special someone. As mentioned, most times love bombing happens unconsciously, but if you feel as though you tend to love bomb because of an underlying fear that you might lose that person in your life, try reaching out to a therapist to find healthier coping mechanisms for you and your partner.
fostering a loving relationship
The ideological model for any relationship involves respect, consideration, trust, and genuine care. To achieve this, you must start by valuing yourself.
Understand your self-worth and be honest with how much you are willing to give. Relationships are complex, but in the challenges, there is an abundance of beauty. Healthy relationships take time, patience, and communication.
The bottom line is that you must be conscious of the type of attention you get in relationships and if at any point you are unhappy, say goodbye. We’re all deserving of pure and true happiness; if anything is getting in the way of that, we simply get rid of it.